Went on a shopping trip alone yesterday , haben been doing that for the longest time ... feeling yes abit lonely but I guess overall was ok , @ least no one to restrain me from buying this n that , of cos that also means i spend alot !!! LOL also no second opinon was given , I had to make all choices myself ... guess there's pros n cons.
Guess I had to be alone but I need to get use to it and live life to it's fullest, had a chat with my classmates last week , feel like having amemsia is not a bad things after all .... they mostly think it good cos they ca nforget certain things in life which is not happy to them, but to me ... it's more like a new me , a changed me. I feel that I been a bad person in life so far , a failure @ many aspect also and I longed to change , but just too lazy n dunno how to start.
Sunday, January 25, 2009
一個人的我也可以過得很好，活得精彩。
Thursday, January 22, 2009
Coughing .... n Coughing ...
Think my cough is killing me once again ... sigh ... guess going to polyclinic again tomorrow ... Just finished baking first batch of pineapple tarts and some suegee cookies ... not too bad ... guess @ least i m doing something i enjoyed. Alot of things happen recently ard me ... 2 of my gals fren broke off ... and just dunno how to console them also cos I ... also just survived a broken r/l. But it got me thinking also .. what I really wans now ? I still think of that someone .... guess I just wans to find out what actually happen but dun think i ever gonna get an answer so i guess i just have to live with it.
What do ppl look in a r/l ? guess for me is very simple .... just 2 ppl ,,, loving each other and in both their hearts there is only each other. to me LOVE is everything , all other obstacles can be overcome. Someone once told me ... no one is meant for another , destiny is in our hands , we fight for our own happiness .... but yet ,.... that someone is the one that hurt me , ha ha . Funny. I was soooooooo touched by those words then but then it only brought myself more sadness. Is there no one out the who will put LOVE/matters of the heart as first place ? To me if 2 person really loved each other that much .. they will do all they can to be together, if things work out of cos good ... if not ... at least both tried!!! Guess I m just still looking for that 2pid someone out there like me ... emotional ... and just believe in love.But really at time i wish i wasn't so emotional ... maybe life will be better. Now i just wish i could find a job soon ... think i gonna give up on love oreadi .. too many ppl had places in my heart liao ... ha ha . Need a job badly to earn $ for my loans and also to forget those ppl in my heart .... no matter what happen ... I love you all :)
*ps : hope my cough will cure soon ... if not ... dying soon.*
Saturday, January 17, 2009
Feeling Lonely ~
Went to Polyclinic today , suddenly feel so lonely , seeing couples there accompany their lover to see doc ... sigh ... Gone were the days where someone will accompany me to the doc , or smsed me now n then to check if ok n stuffs .... Guess i just have to get use to this feeling ... :)
Msg my boss that I would not be helping him anymore @ work cos doc as to rest b4 it got worst , lucky X-ray shows that lungs are ok so just have to rest well.... :) Wish me get well soon and *cross finger* find someone to hangout often and maybe love soon ? LOL
Thursday, January 08, 2009
Back to work ... Part Time !!
Been back to work for 2 days ... 12 - 10 pm each day ... super tired ... guess not young anymore ... Anyway can;t help thinking about what had gone by the last week ... sigh ... i know i should get over it ... but ... it's just me .. the 2pid emo person that every1 dun understand.... Anyway ... tomorrow going for an interview ... had to shaved ... n dye my hair back black ....sigh .... boring once again ... Wish me luck whoever reading this and wish you happy with whoever manage to take ur heart away.
相遇是一种缘，相知，相恋更是一种缘，
缘乃天定，份在人为
缘起而聚，缘尽而散，放手才是真爱！
有一种爱，它的名字就叫放手！
对的时间，遇见对的人，是一生幸福
对的时间，遇见错的人，是一场心伤
错的时间，遇见错的人，是一段荒唐
错的时间，遇见对的人，是一生叹息
其实有些事情，真的是没得到的时候，最珍贵美丽。
Tuesday, January 06, 2009
想太多 - Back to reality
New happiness lasted a week and now ... back to square one .. Single once again n targetless. Agreed with fren that I moved on too fast but it takes both hands to clap but guess I clapped at the wrong hand. Think i should be sent to the Zoo as a protected animal - the most emotional guy of the century... ha ha ... anyway ... sad , yes n moved on - YES .. Just cross finger my career will be better ! Gambatei !!!
Maybe it really takes a great deal to know someone b4 you really jumped into something. Guess not all are so adventurous as me ( or 2pid to put it ) To me , I won't give up until i tried my very best , be it in the end i will ends up hurting myself. Realized alot of ppl i talked to , they give up once they thot things won't worked out , maybe they are too protective of themselves so I can't blamed them too.
"Love" is not something then just said for fun , as there is a saying in Chinese "說者無意，听者有心“ which means that you dun really meant what u said but the listening party might take it to heart. For example : You say "I Love You" , maybe you just meant "I MISS YOU" or " I LIKE YOU" or maybe it just have no meaning to you but to the person listening to it , he/she might thot you really LOVED him/her. Or in another example : you were very angry with your love one and in the heated of a argument you just said " I wish I neber love you or met you" , to you , it might just be a blurt out of words when u angry but to the other party , he/she might have thot you really meant what u said. So always think twice about what you say, as another Chinese saying "禍從口出“ meaning troubles always comes out from mouth ( in terms of words you said ). So next time be mindful about what you gonna say to someone, always think twice , no matters what your emotions @ that time is , it's gonna be hard.
For now ... in my mind ... there is just this song ... " Love dun cost a thing" , if you out there knows what I mean.
Hibernating season .... once again.
Sunday, January 04, 2009
Gw n Krystal Wedding 03012009
Just came back from my best fren's wedding, finally the last of our lot of close frens is married , so happy for them. Top pic is the ice craving they had @ their reception , with fresh fruits in it for eating :) .... Cool ...........
The day started early at 6.15 where WZ came to fetch to GW's place , there we met his fren and cousin n nephew who will be part of the "brothers". When to Krystal's place and 4 of her frens are waiting for us ... to hinder us in the process of rescuing the bride. First they start by asking us to eat Lemons .... which was .... small cos not very sour. Next was honey ,,,, a bowlful ... w/o thinking i took the whole bowl n glup it down ... ha ha , was very sweet !!!! until they ask me to stop n feed the groomwith 2 spoonful. Next was small bitter gourd ice cube ... i pop in 2 even though i dun take bitter one ... ( the bitterness lasted a few hours ) next was chilli .. which i can't take and so BX ( GW's uni fren ) helped , he was garang like me , sour, bitter n spicy.He pop quite a no. until his lips like red. Then next up they ask to life up our pants to show our legs , i knew they had wanted somethign to deal with hairs ... leg hairs ... and true ... soon they took out some tapes ... n i volunteer myself and i used all the 6 tapes up ... not very pain but have to " act act " bit bit to entertain them LOL.
After that , we continue with the tea ceremony on both sides then went to the hotel to make sure the room for there solemnisation was ready.And then we fall out when the whole thing was over ... reached home about 3.15pm.Went to sleep at ard 4 pm and overselpt until mum wake me up @ 5.40pm ( was supposed to wake up @ 5.15 pm but i set alarm to 5.15am.
WZ picked me up @ 6pm and we left for the hotel. There help abit here n there and when they were having the toasting session , thot he got enuff ppl on stage so the few of us "act blur" until GW when to the mic and shouted my name ... was feeling 50/50 cos 50% was a bit malu ... to be called up like that thru the mic , 50% was hmmm he really treated me as one of his best fren thus name is the first to be called ( only one to be exact ) After that helped with the photo taking session, which i did not want to help cos thot he got enuff ppl .. so i can take a rest. But in the end ... being the KPO one ... i still helped the whole process ... cos since he trusted n tasked me with that in the first place.
Finally the last of my best fren got married , so happy for them .... it also will mark my last time of duty as a "brother" and all well ends well ..... To Guowei and Krystal , Happy Marriage and May Love follow you 2 always in ur lifelong happiness.
Thursday, January 01, 2009
Happy yr 2009 to all ~
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Had a gathering @ my fren place , we had porridge for the first time ... quite cool ... did some desserts and review not too bad :) Chatted a lot, catch up alot of old times ... and finally the last of the lot is getting married this Sat 3/1/09 , wish him and his wife all the best. Everything was like perfect , except i still need to find a good job.
Came home ... dad was complainting about mum , sigh ... y do i have to be involved in this ... and sigh ... i think i really need a job ... and change my life abit bit ... for th better of cos ... I can only hope.
2009 - might be a start of many new things , for once , I m back to single again but "seeing someone?". It adds alot to myself .. "am i ready ? " "is the other party ready?" "are we meant for each other ?" hmmm might be thinking too far but that that is one bad point about me now .... I will just follow my heart and see where it leads.
Hopefully 2009 is a good year ... looking forward to 1) get a good career, 2) be a good BF ? 3) have a happy family 4) friendship.
